Ballin' on a Budget: Feelings Pudding

What do you do when you’re overwhelmed with emotion? Aside from crying, I mean. What do you do with your body?

Do you go for a run (lol)? Turn on really loud music and dance? Fall into a netflix hole?

I make pudding.

There’s something so meditative to me about stirring a milk and eggs over a low flame until it turns into a luscious creamy chocolate pudding.

I’ve made this when I’m falling in love, when I’m heartbroken, when I’m scared, when I’m excited- really anytime I have extra feelings in my body that I’m not quite sure what to do with. I just stir them into pudding.

The other amazing thing about this recipe is that it can be made pretty much anywhere- it requires so little equipment and so few ingredients which makes it a perfect recipe for you to make as a houseguest- I love leaving these behind when I stay with friends! The vessel you put it in doesn’t matter so much, this recipe is pretty forgiving and can be made in a pot, a pan, a tart shell, a 9x13” pan or a cauldron.

It’s dairy free, costs about $8 to make and comes together in about fifteen minutes of active prepwork plus about 45 minutes of chilling time in the fridge. This can be made a few days ahead of serving and kept covered in the fridge until you’re ready to serve.

THE ONLY RULE WITH FEELINGS PUDDING: You MUST eat this straight out of the container. The only way you can serve it is by handing people spoons. If you are not comfortable eating this straight out of the container with the people you are serving it to, they are not close enough to you to eat feelings pudding with.

Feelings Pudding
(makes enough)

20 vanilla oreos
2 TBSP coconut oil

1 can full fat coconut milk
2 egg yolks
1 12oz bag bittersweet chocolate chips (I like Ghirardelli)

flaky salt

Crush the oreos. I did this in a large ziplock with a rolling pin but you can use a food processor- you just want them to be in fine crumbs. Combine the oreo crumbs with the coconut oil and press into your pan. I used a 9” pie dish, but this will really work in any shape pan- a bread pan, an 8x8” pan, a small pot- whatever you’ve got! Place the crust in the freezer to set up while you make the custard.

In a saucepan over a low flame, combine the whole can of coconut milk and egg yolks. Whisk, constantly, until the mixture coats the bottom of a spoon (this means that when you dip the spoon in and run your finger through it, the custard holds its place and doesn’t fill in where you’ve run your finger through). Remove from heat and pour the chocolate chips in. Cover them completely with the liquid and let them sit for a minute to soften, then whisk until he mixture is smooth and shiny.

Pour the custard through a fine mesh sieve and then into the crust, which should be fairly set by now. Put the feelings pudding back in the freezer for 20 minutes or in the fridge for 45 minutes-1 hour until it doesn’t wiggle when you move the dish. Top with flaky sea salt, give everybody a spoon and have some feelings about it.

xo
Audrey

Deep Dark Fudge Brownies (GF)

Let's talk about babysitter slices for a minute.

You know, the kind you take when you're babysitting and they have MUCH better snacks at their house than you do at yours.

I'm talking entenmanns fudge frosted cake.

Or like two day old glazed munchkins.

Capri Sun. Ugggghhhhhh. 

The best houses though are the ones with a tray of boxed brownies. Shiny and crinkled studded with chocolate chips. You would slice off millimeter by millimeter of those brownies so the parents wouldn't know that you ate all of their snacks, right?

Now, as a functioning adult, I am totally aware of the fact that the parents would not give a hoot about whether or not I was eating their snacks. In fact, they probably would want me and my 15 year old metabolism to help them with that tray of brownies. But for whatever reason it felt like a scandalous secret to sneak slices of sugar after the kids went to bed, did it not? 

These brownies are reminiscent of that simple add oil water and egg boxed mix you made when you were a kid except they're about a billion times fudgier and gooier and yummier. 

Deep Dark Fudge Brownies
(this recipe is kind've in weight. Please don't hate me. I promise it makes a difference)

85g Gluten Free Flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter
300g sugar
3 eggs
75g cocoa powder
1 TBSP vanilla (for real no joke)
4oz dark chocolate, chopped

Preheat the oven to 350 and line an 8" square pan with parchment paper.

Whisk together the flour, baking powder and salt and set aside.

In a different bowl, whisk together the eggs, cocoa and vanilla for about a minute until super smooth and glossy.

In a medium saucepan, melt the butter and sugar over medium low heat whisking constantly. Don't let it bubble! Keep it low until the sugar has dissolved! Rub a tiny bit between your fingers to see if it's smooth. 

Slowly stream the melted butter mixture into the egg/cocoa mixture while whisking constantly until combined and then whisk for another whole entire minute- this is what will give you that glossy cracky top! Fold in the dry ingredients juuuuuust until combined, tossing the chopped chocolate near the end and folding that in too!

Spread evenly into the parchment lined pan and bake for 25 minutes, until the center is just set and doesn't jiggle when you wiggle the pan.

Let cool in the pan or be impatient like me and dig in with a spoon and burn the roof of your mouth with melted chocolate, both ways are totally okay.

Let's go have some brownies about it, shall we?

xo
Audrey

(vegan) Dark Chocolate Sorbet

What does ice cream mean to you? 

Is it nostalgia- sitting in the trunk of your mom's SUV with the fam on a summer evening with mint chocolate chip dripping all over your tiny hands watching the motorcyclists drive past the beach?

Is it comfort- the Phish Food hug you need when you realize he's not the one? 

Is it connection- every vanilla with rainbow sprinkles you see reminds you of your best friend that lives halfway across the country? 

This might not be 'real' ice cream, but you wouldn't know it. It's ultra creamy mouthfeel combined with intense dark chocolate create an illusion of decadence- when really you're just eating frozen water! 

Dark Chocolate Sorbet
(recipe from David Leibovitz)
makes 1 quart

2 1/4 c (555ml) water
1 c sugar (200g) (can sub coconut sugar here!)
3/4 c (75g) cocoa powder
1 generous pinch salt
6oz bittersweet chocolate, chopped finely
1/2 tsp vanilla extract

\\ DAY BEFORE - if your ice cream maker is not a self compressing kind, don't forget to put the bowl in the freezer so you don't have to wait another whole day to dive into this deliciousness!

\\ In a large saucepan, whisk together 1 1/2 c water with the sugar, cocoa powder and salt (for real- don't put all the water in now or you'll end up with mega hard unscoopable sorbet)

\\ Bring to a boil over medium heat, whisking constantly. Let boil for 45 seconds then remove from heat.

\\ Stir in chocolate and vanilla extract until chocolate is completely melted, then stir in the remaining (room temp) water.

\\ Transfer to a blender and blend (holding the lid on with a towel so you don't have a chocolate explosion!) for about 30 seconds, until the the color has lightened a shade or two.

\\ Chill the mixture thoroughly (at least 2 hours), then transfer to your ice cream maker and freeze according to the machine's directions.

\\ Serve with a pinch of flaky sea salt, crushed pretzels, or anything but gummy bears! 

xo Audrey
 

|dairy free| Chocolate Chia Mousse

Ask and ye shall receive. I'm back on the food writing bandwagon! Blogs are so 2008, but so is Taylor Swift and we're not over her yet! 

Mostly I'm coming back to this space to connect. I have so much to share and I need a platform to share it. I'm always looking for food inspiration, so I figured you probably are too! 

These days I'm eating 90% vegan and 10% pizza and tacos. Expect to find similar ratios here. Healthy, balanced, SIMPLE meals that you (yeah-you!) can totally make with a relatively minimal ingredient list. Last time I shared recipes (high school) I subsisted on 95% sugar and 5% cucumbers. I'm hoping this chronicle can serve as a source of inspiration for you and I both, to help you realize that eating (consistently) healthy doesn't have to mean bland salads, steamed broccoli, or million dollar a month subscription services. 

I'm still deeply infatuated with dessert, there will be no shortage of sweets here BUT they will no longer be sickeningly sweet- that's just not my jam. 

Let's get on with it, then-

Vegan Chocolate Chia Mousse with Coconut Whipped Cream
serves 2, for when you're tryna impress that hot yoga teacher you invited over for dinner and then promptly realized that the only dessert you're confident with is slice & bake cookies

1/4 cup + 2 TBSP chia seeds
1 cup almond milk (unsweetened)
1/4 cup cocoa powder (as dark as possible, I use Varlhona)
3 TBSP honey
pinch salt
cacao nibs, for serving

1 can coconut milk, refrigerated overnight
1 tsp vanilla extract

\\ combine the first five ingredients in a medium bowl, whisk until they're friends.
\\ allow to rest in the fridge for at least an hour and a half, up to overnight.
\\ blend the chia pudding mixture until light and fluffy (mine fit in my lil ninja blender), you'll notice the color change and the pudding will smooth out a bunch!
\\ spoon the mousse into two cups, refrigerate for another hour (up to two days, covered)

When ready to serve:
\\ in a separate bowl, open the can of coconut milk and pour off the liquid in the can (save it for smoothies!)
\\ beat the solid fatty part of the coconut milk with a hand mixer until light and fluffy, mix in vanilla.
\\ top mousse with coconut whipped cream, cacao nibs & another pinch of sea salt! 
\\ allow your guest to ogle you in delight because you are, undoubtedly, a magician.

may your heart always be j o y f u l,

audrey